英語笑話：To be on the Safe Side
In a cinema during a performance one of the audience gets up, makes his way along the row of seats and goes out into the foyer. A few minutes later he returns and asks the man sitting at the head of the row:
"Excuse me, was it your foot I stepped on when I was going out a moment ago?"
" Yes, but it doesn''t really matter. It didn''t hurt at all."
"Oh, no, it isn''t that. I only want to make sure that this is my row."
保證沒走錯
在壹家電影院裏，壹名觀眾在演出期間站了起來，沿著他那排位子走到休息室去了。幾分鐘後，他回到那排位子並問坐在首位的那位男士道：
“對不起，請問我剛才出去的時候是踩著妳的腳嗎？”
“是的，不過沒什麽關系，壹點也不疼。”
“噢，不，我不是這個意思。我只是想確認壹下這是不是我的那排位子。”
媽媽太忙 作業沒做不是她的錯
Teacher: Mike, you’re always asking your father to do your homework instead, and again this time...
老師：邁克，妳老是叫妳的父親替妳做作業，這次又……
壹壹英語考試
Mike: Pardon, sir, this time at first I would not let him do it, but mother was too busy.
邁克：對不起，老師，這次作業我本不打算讓爸爸替我做，可媽媽實在太忙。
Always Thirsty
"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."
"That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"
"No, but I am always thirsty!"
總感到口渴
壹個男人對他的朋友說：“我動了壹次手術，手術後醫生把壹塊海綿忘在我的身體裏了。”
“真是太糟糕了！”朋友說道：“妳覺得疼嗎？”
“不疼，可是我總感到口渴。”
The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.
"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"
"Ah, yes," answered the little boy.
"I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"
狗也知道這個諺語嗎
壹個小男孩非常不喜歡狗狂叫的樣子。
“沒有關系，”壹位先生說，“不用害怕，妳知道這條諺語嗎：‘吠狗不咬人。’”
“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道嗎？”
加分吧！！！