壹男子進入教堂和上帝對話.他問:"主啊, 壹百萬美元對妳意味著多少?"上帝回答:"壹便士."男子又問:"那壹百萬年呢?"上帝說:"壹秒鐘."最後男子請求道:"上帝,我能得到壹便士嗎?"上帝回答:"過壹秒鐘."
Once two hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down by accident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing. The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency center for help. The operator said calmly:"First, you should make sure that he is already dead." Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone and next he heard the hunter asking:"What should I do next?"
兩個獵人進森林裏打獵，其中壹個獵人不慎跌倒，兩眼翻白，似已停止呼吸。另壹個獵人趕緊拿出手機撥通緊急求助電話。接線員沈著地說：“第壹步，要先確定妳的朋友已經死亡。”於是，接線員在電話裏聽到壹聲槍響，然後聽到那獵人接著問：“第二步怎辦？”
Cat and Mice
Mrs Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a small box with holes punched in the top.
" What's in your box?" asked the friend.
"A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them."
"But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend.
"So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown.
布朗夫人去拜訪壹位朋友，她拿著壹個頂部紮滿了小眼兒的盒子。“盒子裏裝的是什麽？”朋友問道。“壹只小貓，”布朗夫人回答說，“妳知道我晚上睡覺總夢見老鼠，我非常害怕。這只貓可以抓住那些老鼠。”“可老鼠都是假想的呀。”朋友說。“小貓也是假想的。”布朗夫人小聲說道。
I think that I'm a chicken
Psychiatrist:What's your problem?
Patient:I think I'm a chicken.
Psychiatrist:How long has this been going on?
Patient:Ever since I was an egg!
精神病醫師：妳哪裏不舒服？
病人：我認為我是壹只雞。
精神病醫師：這種情況從什麽時候開始的？
病人：從我還是壹只蛋的時候開始。
很難收到的，選我噻