英語幽默句子

英語幽默句子精選

　 英語幽默句子，英語如此搞笑，翻譯如此殘暴！

　I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

　開始我直接求上帝賜輛自行車。後來我琢磨上帝辦事兒不是這個路數。於是老子偷了壹輛然後求上帝寬恕。

　Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

　妳永遠不能戰勝壹個純SB，因為他會把妳的智商拉到跟他個水平，然後用豐富的經驗打敗妳.

　I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

　曾以為我想要的`是職業，結果發現我只是想要工資。

　Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

　直譯：知識就是說妳知道西紅柿是壹種水果；智慧就好似不要把它放進水果沙拉裏。

　意譯a：知識就是告訴妳說應該把雞蛋放進籃子，智慧則是叫妳不要把所有雞蛋都放進壹個籃子。

　意譯b：所謂知識就是知道韓少和小四都屬於80後，但智慧告訴妳最終還是男女有別。

　If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.

　上帝瞅著咱們呢，大夥好歹喜感點吧！

　Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

　孩子就是：妳先花2年，教丫們走路和說話。然後妳再花16年教丫們坐定和閉嘴。

　Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says"If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?

　當我填表的時候，有壹項是“緊急情況聯系：” 我填上了“醫生”，到時候我媽能幫上什麽忙？！

　The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

　直譯：小孩子要中間名，純粹是為了讓他知道他啥時候真的有麻煩了。

　意譯：起個全名就為了揍孩子前可以底氣十足地喊出來。

　It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.

　跳樓的時候，“啊——”的時候還沒死， “啪！”那才是死了。

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