5人短劇。搞笑的匪徒,搞笑的綁架案，不錯的劇本。
人物
Bunny Cheng: Bunny Chen
Eliza Lin: Daughter
Celine Tu: Reporter et Aside
Sano Hsieh: Small gangster(小流氓)
Trent Cheng: Big gangster(大流氓)
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SCENE I
A mother is doing exercise in the living room when the phone is ringing. And her daughter is in the school now.
Mom: Hello~
Caller: (A boy is crying.) Ha! Your kid is here. Do you hear his voice? If you want to save your kid, prepare the ransom.
Mom: Are you crazy? I don’t have a son!!! Don’t try to cheat me. Stupid guy!
The mother is very angry and hung up the phone. But later… the phone is ringing again…
Mom: Hello~
Caller: Hello~ Are you busy now?
Mom: (I recognize the voice.) You are a fraud, right? Do you want to trick me again? Is it fun? Don’t do such a boring thing, O.K.? I won’t believe you.
Caller: Really? Listen to this.(A girl is crying on the phone, ”mom, help me~ help me~)
Mom: Oh~ you are a good actor. This time is better but I still won’t fall into your trap to rob me of my money! If you call again, I will call the cop. Do you understand? (Hang up the phone more angrier.)
But the voice sounds like her daughter’s and the mom is not disturbed. She decides to go to the elementary school to see her daughter. The mom got there…
Mom: Eliza~
Eliza: Mom~ why you are here? Are you missing me? Do you come here to pick me up?
Mom: Ya~ are you happy in the school? Let’s go home. I want to tell you something on the way home.
Mom tells Eliza about the phone scam and wants her to be careful from now on.
SCENE II
Because the mother didn’t believe the two gangsters really kidnapped her kid, the gangsters were furious. So they decided to kidnap her daughter this time.
The gangsters have found the school her daughter studies in, and observed for many days. Today is the day they plan to kidnap the child.
The big gangster always focuses on what he’s doing but the small gangster is usually absent-minded.
Big gangster: Hey! Concentrate!! (The big gangster hit the small gangster’s head)
Small gangster: Ouch! O.K. O.K.
At this moment, the girl appears.
Small gangster: (Check the picture.) Hey!! Buddy!! Look! Is that her?
Big gangster: Ha! Ha! Ha! It’s hunting time.
Small gangster: I’m so excited!! Oh~ what a beautiful girl. Just like a fairy. My sweetheart… Buddy do you know? I feel that I get butterflies in my stomach!
Big gangster: (Hitting the small gangster’s head again.) Hey! Wake up!! Stop day-dreaming. Let’s make a move!
Small gangster: Oh~ my baby~ I’m coming!!
Big gangster: Hey!! Lady!! Can you do me a favor?
Eliza: Sure! What can I do for you?
Small gangster: (Murmuring) This beautiful lady has a beautiful heart.
Big gangster: Sorry. Ignore what he said.
Eliza: Never mind!
Big gangster: Thanks! I want to go to Tunghai University. Do you know how can I get there?
Eliza: Oh… you should go straight until the traffic light, then turn right until you see a convenience store at the corner and turn left. Keep going straight and you would see the university.
Big gangster: Go straight until the first traffic light, turn right and we will see a supermarket at the end of the street. And…
Eliza: No! No! No! Go straight until the traffic light, then turn right until you see a convenience store at the corner and turn left. Keep going straight and you would see the university.
Small gangster: Go straight until the first traffic light, then turn left and go straight to the end of the street, then we can see the university.
Eliza: Oh, my! No! Wrong again! You two are really a stupid guy.
Big gangster: It’s too complex. I can’t remember all the directions. I’m a foreigner. And I have an important presentation there. Could you go with us, guide us there? Please~
Eliza was confused. But she is a kind person and she likes to help people.
Eliza: Umm… let me think… okay!! Let’s go!
Small gangster: How kind of you!! My little girl.
Big gangster: Sorry. Just ignore him. Thank for your help.
Eliza goes with the gangsters.
In the gangsters’ car, the small gangster suddenly shows a sharp knife. And shouts, “Don’t move!” Eliza is shocked and starts screaming.
Eliza: What are you doing?
Small gangster: I’m kidnapping you!
Eliza: Oh~ I am so scared.
Small gangster: (Talk to the big gangster.) Did you hear that, she is scared?
Big gangster: Ya~ we are professional.
Eliza: Not funny! I’m hungry. I want to go home! I want to go home!
Small gangster: Shut up. Don’t be so noisy!
Eliza keeps crying.
Small gangster: You! Get out of the car!
Big gangster: (Hit the small gangster angrily!) Idiot! I have a stupid partner. (Disappointed)
Eliza: I agree! (Nod head.)
Big gangster: Don’t cry baby, I give you a lollipop.
Eliza: Thank you. How kind of you.
SCENE III
Mother is preparing dinner.
Mom: Eliza! Eliza! Time for dinner! I’m hungry! Hurry up!
No one answers her. And she realizes there is something wrong.
Mom: Eliza, where are you? Don’t play hide and seek with me! It’s not funny. I’m hungry.
As the mother is finding her daughter, the phone rings.
Mom: Hello~ this is Anderson. I’m busy finding my daughter. Don’t bother me!
Big gangster: Are you finding your daughter? Ha! Ha! Ha… she is right here.
Mom: Good job! Tell her it’s time for dinner. I’m hungry!
Big gangster: Hey! You are clueless. I have already kidnapped your daughter, Eliza Anderson!
Mom: Hey! Buddy! Don’t trick me!
Big gangster: Sure! Listen! (The gangster takes the phone to Eliza.)
Eliza: Hello! Mom! I’m here! They are so kind. They gave me a lollipop.
The gangster takes the phone away.
Big gangster: Do you believe me now? If you want your daughter to come back for dinner. You have to prepare the ransom of NT $ 20,000,000.
Mom: Too expensive! 20% off.
Big gangster: Are you buying clothes?
Mom: Bargain is my hobby.
Big gangster: No negotiation you should bring the ransom to Tunghai Lake at 8:00 pm. And remember don’t call the cop. Or you will find your daughter in the lake.
Mom: O.K. See you then!
At Tunghai Lake. The gangsters and Eliza are baking fish from the lake because they are hungry. At this time, the mother is coming.
Mom: Ha! (Mom shouts.)
The gangsters and Eliza are shocked. And the small gangster’s fish is falling down on the floor.
Small gangster: Oh,! My fish! Who’s there?
Mom: It’s me, Bunny Anderson, Eliza’s mother, Anderson’s wife. Where is my daughter? Release my daughter.
Eliza: Hi! Mom, I’m here. Do you want to come here to eat fish?
Big gangster: Where is the ransom?
Mom: Release my daughter first!
Big gangster: Give me the ransom first!
Mom: No way!
And the battle begins.
Mom: Justice is always the winner.
Eliza: Oh~ Yeah! Mom, you win!
Celine: Ha! I got it! I got it! A new…… headline.
Celine: I am at Tunghai Lake. Earlier, there was a violent fighting. A watermelon knife V.S. A B.B.Q. fork. According to the witnesses, a mother fought with the gangsters for her daughter. And the mother won. Now, let’s interview the persons involved.
Celine: Do you feel regretful? Do you feel sorry to this society?
Small gangster: I……
Celine: I…… I know. You are very sorry and regretful. How about you? (Turn to the big gangster.)
Big gangster: None of your business. (Run to the wall.) Leave me alone.
Eliza: Me! Me!
Celine: What do you want to say?
Eliza: Uh…My mom is so cool. She came to save me!
Mom: My turn. My turn.
Celine: O.K. O.K. What do you want to say after winning the fight?
Mom: Well……
Celine: Well, you are very happy and proud of yourself to be the winner in the battle.
Mom: Yes. And the gangsters…
Celine: Oh, the gangsters are very stupid and silly.
Mom: Right. And they…
Celine: They want to trick you, but…
Mom: But… enough. I’m hungry. I want to go home with my daughter.
Celine: Next time, if you receive a phone call from a scam artist, here are the things you can do to avoid being tricked. First, stay clam and be skeptical about it. The caller hopes to fool you with a moving story, causing you to forget your good judgment. A little doubt can protect you. Second, verify the story. Call the organization to make sure the story is true. Third, report it to the police. And don’t deal with the villains on your own. One phone call will often expose a trap quickly. However, to tell the truth, the mother is really very brave. She is my idol. I want to keep her sign. This is reporter Celine reporting from Tunghia Lake for TVAS.