An offender was brought to trial before a judge. The judge asked him, "What is the crime you have committed?"
The offender said, "I went shopping too early during the New Year."
The judge said, "This is not a crime! Is there a mistake, perhaps? So how early did you go shopping?"
He answered, "The shop was not yet open for business, and I was already inside."
有個犯人被帶到法官面前審案，法官問他:“妳犯了什麽罪？”
犯人說：“因為我在新年時，太早去采購了。”
法官說：“這不是罪呀！可能是弄錯吧？那妳多早去采購呢？”
他說：“商店還沒開門，我就已經進去了”。
2、我是來裝電話的 What a big deal
A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.
Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone."
壹個年輕人剛剛開始做生意，就租了壹個漂亮的辦公室。壹天，他坐在辦公室裏，看到有壹個人在外面，於是他就裝作生意很忙的樣子，拿起電話胡吹亂侃，還不停的甩出幾個大數字，好像在談壹筆大買賣。
到了最後，他終於掛了電話，問來訪的人，“有事兒嘛？”那個人回答，“我是來給妳安裝電話的。”
3、我已經努力好多年了 I've been trying to do that for years
A man went to the police office wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before.
"You will get your chance in court." said the Desk Sergeant.
"No, no, no." said the man. "I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I've been trying to do that for years."
壹個人來到警察局想和昨天潛入他家偷盜的賊聊聊，警察告訴他說，“妳在法庭上會有這個機會的。”
“不，不，不”，這個人說，“我就是想知道他是如何做到潛入我家並且還能不驚醒我的老婆，我已經努力好多年了都沒能做到這點。”
4、