請英語高手幫我翻譯壹笑話，翻譯成英文？

Xia Yeban sets of chain and a woman, a man followed bad plot, the women's fear of passing through the cemetery, the inspiration, at the tomb said: "Dad, I come back, ah open the door." Big men fear, run away. Women's peace of mind, was about to leave the grave in all of a sudden came the ominous sound: "The daughter, Wang Dai you the keys." Horrified woman, and run away. Drilled in a tomb from the Raider said: "I held up, scared to death of you!" Raider's voice faded, it was found next to the old man had a tombstone is engraved with a chisel, out of curiosity, asked, the old man said angrily: " They carved my name wrong. "Raider great fear, run and flee. An old man sneered: "I am pinching and also some young ......" being said, accidentally chisel off the ground, the old man about to pick up a bent, the chisel was found in bushes in the grip Of a hand, the old man is surprised, a voice said: "Yes you court death, change indiscriminate building my house!" Frightened old man Pigunniaoliu, rolling down the hillside. At this time, a scavengers from climbing out of the bushes: "Alas, in recent years have engaged in a piece of scrap metal Feizhemeda strong!"