簡單英語笑話四則
1.Wife:You see.According to te statistics on the paper 80% of those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcoho.
Husband:It's okey. To my investigation, all Thespeopleeat meals.
妻子：妳看這張報紙，據統計，死於肝癌的人80%都是喝酒的'。
丈夫：那有什麽?據我調查，死予肝癌的人100%都吃飯的。
2."Excuse me,but the seat you've taken is mine."
"Yours?Can you prove it?"
"Yes,I put a cup of ice cream on it."
"請原諒，妳占了我的位置."
"妳的位置?妳能征明這點嗎?"
"能，我在位置上放了杯冰激淩."
3."I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."
"That"s terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"
"No, but I am always thirsty!"
壹個男人對他的朋友說：?我動了壹次手術，手術後醫生把壹塊海綿忘在我的身體裏了。?
?真是太糟糕了!?朋友說道：?妳覺得疼嗎?
?不疼，可是我總感到口渴。?
4.A guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage.
"Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!"
"Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back.
"You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest."
壹位車上的列車員剛發出信號讓火車啟動，這時他看見壹位很漂亮的姑娘站在站臺上壹節打開的車廂門旁邊，跟車廂裏另壹位漂亮姑娘在說話。
?快點，小姐!?他喊道：?請把門關上。?
?噢，我還沒有和妹妹吻別呢。?她回答道。
?請把門關上好了，?列車員說：?其余的事由我負責。?
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