英式幽默英語笑話

英式幽默英語笑話

　女人為什麽既美麗又愚蠢?

　A husband said to his wife, "Why did God create women to be beautiful but foolish?"

　"Well," his wife answered at once. "The reason is very simple. God made us beautiful so men would love us; God made us foolish so we would marry them."

　壹位丈夫對他的妻子說：?為什麽上帝把婦女創造得如此美麗卻又愚蠢呢?

　?噢，?他的妻子立刻回答道，?原因很簡單。上帝使我們如此美麗，男人才會愛我們。上帝使我們如此愚蠢，我們才會嫁給他們。?

　壹只死蒼蠅

　Mr. Smith: Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.

　Waiter: Yes, sir, I know, it's the heat that kills it.

　史密斯先生：服務員，我的湯裏有壹只死蒼蠅。

　服務員：是的，先生，我知道了，它是被燙死的。

　昂貴的.建議

　The doctor finally reached his table at a dinner, after breaking away from a woman who sought advice on a health problem. "Do you think I should send her a bill?" the doctor asked a lawyer who sat next to him.

　"Why not?" the lawyer replied. "You rendered professional services by giving advice."

　"Thanks," the physician said. "I think I'll do that."

　When the doctor went to his office the next day to send the bill to the woman, he found a letter from the lawyer. It read: "For legal services, $50."

　大夫在打發走了壹個就健康問題向他咨詢的婦女之後，最後來到餐桌上。?妳認為我應該向她收費嗎?大夫問坐在身邊的壹個律師。

　?有什麽不應該?律師答道，?妳通過提建議提供了職業性服務。?

　?謝謝，?大夫說道，?看來我得這麽做。?

　第二天當大夫去辦公室給那位婦女寫賬單時，他收到律師的壹封信。信中寫道：?請付法律服務費50美元。?

　我教老師

　Mother asked her little boy, Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?

　Nothing, Mum, answered the son proudly, instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told her three.

　母親問她年幼的兒子：寶貝，今天老師教了妳些什麽?

　兒子驕傲地說：什麽都沒教，媽媽。她反倒問我壹加二等於幾，我告訴她等於三。

　壹個秘密

　A: "This matter I just tell you one person, you must the secret for me."

　B: "Trust, not only I want secret for you, I will tell everybody to be secret for you."

　甲：?這件事我只告訴妳壹人，請妳千萬為我保密。?

　乙：?放心，不但我要為妳保密，我還要告訴大家都來為妳保密。?

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