急！請英語高手幫我翻譯壹下雕牌洗衣粉恐怖笑話！在線等！下面是中文！如果有幻燈片最好或者有更搞笑的長

There was a man with his girlfriend who he loved more than anyone in the world。But one day，his girlfriend left him ruthlessly without even a reason。watching her walking happily with someone else hand in hand in the street instead of himself，he was filled with pain and sorrow then he gone out of mad and finally killed her。He had planned to commit suicide after she died。It was not until the very time he was going to finish himself that he came to realize the value of being alive。but he was not able to have a normal life from then on ‘cause he had been entangled in nightmares in which his girldfriend naked，hair disheveled ，red tongue hang long to the ground，and ten fingers hooked to ask him for life。the nightmare had tortured him and he turned as thin as a skeleton finally，he sent for a Taoist who suggest him to do three things。

first，he should find a good place to rebury her body with decent dress；second，the pajamas his girldfriend wore while alive must be burned to the ground，at last，wash clean the cloths in blood he had hiden ，all these three things must be well finished by twelve in the night，or there would be a killing punishment。he had well finished all the things the Taoist had advised him except for the third thing。he was not able to find the bloody cloths。it was then at the cornor of twelve，he was so norvous and excited that big sweat droped from his face and wetted the carpet。lucky enough，he found it by the end of the time but the blood in the cloths cannot be washed off no matter haw hard he had rubbed。at this time，angry wind came to being，thunder and lightning gone one after another，windows were blowed left and right，the sound of the broken glasses thrilled people，all of a sudden，all the ligths seemed

to be turned down on their own and the whole house fell to a blackout。his girlfriend，wearing a pajamas full of blood in the lightning ，her eyes filled with blood，pointed him ferociously ：

do you know why you cannot wash it cleanhe was too frightened to utter a word。his girldfriend continued，because you are not using the diao’s wsahing power！