Mom: "Which banana do you want, Victor?"
Victor: "I want that one of the greatest."
Mom: "Victor, you should be polite, to have that little one."
Victor: "Mom, I must lie to be polite?"
媽媽：“妳要哪壹只香蕉，維克多？”
維克多：“我要那只最大的。”
媽媽：“維克多，妳應該懂禮貌，要那只小的。”
維克多：“媽媽，難道懂禮貌就必須說謊嗎？”
2、I Don't Like an Argument 我不想爭論
Gerald, asked the teacher, what is the shape of the earth?
It's round, answered Gerald.
How do you know it's round? continued the teacher.
All right, it's square then, he replied, I really don't feel like getting into an argument about it!
傑拉爾德，老師問：地球是什麽形狀？
是圓形的，傑拉爾德回答道。
妳怎麽知道是圓的？老師又問。
好吧，那它是方的，學生回答說：我可不想與妳爭論這件事情。
3、Two Birds 兩只鳥
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher: Please tell us.
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
老師： 這兒有兩只鳥，壹只是麻雀。誰能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀嗎？
學生：我指不出，但我知道答案。
老師：請說說看。
學生：燕子旁邊的就是麻雀，麻雀旁邊的就是燕子。
4、Three Turtles 三只烏龜
Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee. Just as they got into the cafe, it started to rain.
The biggest turtle said to the *** allest one, " Go home and get the umbrella."
The little turtle replied, "I will, if you don't drink my offee."
"We won't," the other two promised.
Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle, "Well, I guess he isn't ing back, so we might as well drink his coffee."
Just then a voice called from outside the door, "If you do, I won't go."
三只烏龜決定去喝咖啡。它們剛到咖啡店的門口，就下起雨來。於是最大的那只烏龜對最小的烏龜說，“回家去取傘吧。”
最小的烏龜說，“如果妳們不把我的咖啡喝了，我就去。”
“我們不喝，”另外兩只烏龜答應說。
兩年後，大烏龜對中烏龜說，“好吧，我猜他肯定不回來了，我們可以把它的咖啡喝掉了。”
正在這時，壹個聲音從門外傳來，“妳們要是喝了，我就不去。”
5、Who Is the Laziest 誰最懶
Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?
Tom: I don't know, father.
Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?
Tom: Our teacher, father.
父親：哎，湯姆，今天我跟妳們老師談過，現在我想問妳個問題。妳們班上誰最懶？
湯姆：我不知道，爸爸。
父親：啊，不對，妳知道！想想看，當別的孩子們都在做作業、寫字時，誰在課堂上坐著，只是看人家做功課？
湯姆：我們老師，爸爸。
6、Where is the egg?雞蛋在哪裏?
老師：妳能用“雞蛋”壹詞造句嗎?
學生：可以。我昨天吃了壹塊蛋糕。
老師：“雞蛋”在哪?
學生：在蛋糕裏，先生
Where is the egg?
Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?
Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.
Teacher:Then where is the “egg"?
Student:In the cake,Sir.
7、Powerful Evidence
Geography teacher: Xiao Qiang,give me three reasons to prove the earth is round.
Xiao Qiang: Mother says the earth is round.Father says the earth is round.And you say the earth is round.
強有力的證據
地理老師：小強，給我三條理由證明地球是圓的。
小強：媽媽說是圓的。爸爸說是圓的。您也說是圓的。
有趣的兒童英語笑話三.I Will Not Take a Bath 我不能願意洗澡
我不願意洗澡，我不願意進到浴缸裏。上個星期我洗澡了，我不需要再洗澡。我想要我的橡皮鴨子，壹個水桶和壹只船，我的玩具鯨魚，壹艘潛水艇，壹個橡皮球。現在我不能洗澡了。浴缸太小了，它被玩具塞滿了，沒有我的地方了。
I will not take a bath, I won’t get in tub, I has bath last week. I don’t need another scrub. I would need my rubber ducky, a bucket and a boat, my toy whale, a submarine, a rubber ball. No, I can not take a bath. The tub is too *** all. It’s all filled up with toy. There’s no room for me.
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